The Down Bad Boys: Minor Penalties Short Story

The Down Bad Boys

“[Image: Tom Crowler and Jax Grant holding the Stanley Cup between them as they skate a victory lap] The Sea Lions are your 2026 Cup champions! Join us for the parade tomorrow!”

Top comments:

seelionssaylions: WOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOO

howza68: congrats, boys!

(Posted to the official San Francisco Sea Lions Instagram account on 06/20/2026)

Chris tossed a frisbee to Jayden on the broad expanse of green at Golden Gate Park. He wore a T-shirt with the sleeves cut off, basketball shorts and a backward baseball cap. A tuft of curls stuck out through the cutout of the hat. His face shone red with exertion and alcohol—he was on his fourth beer, a lot for Chris. His biceps looked massive.

Luca licked his lips and took another swig of his own beer.

He’d had significantly more than four.

“What’s with the murder face, bro?” Diego slung an arm over Luca’s shoulders. He reeked of sweat and stale beer, as did they all. Still, it was less bearable on someone else. Luca shrugged him off.

“Seriously. We won the cup. We are Stanley Cup motherfucking Champions.” Diego broke off from whatever his point was to cheer loudly and every team member in earshot followed suit.

Luca thought that was the end of it and returned to ogling, but Diego had not forgotten. “What gives, man? It’s our parade day. It’s a whole big party for us all day. Why are you looking at Breezy like he ate your cat?”

“I don’t have a cat.”

“It’s a metaphor, dude.”

“Actually,” Jax interjected from his position lounging on a lawn chair he’d brought specifically for the hour-long stop of the party train here, “you used ‘like’, so it’s a simile.”

The shock of Jax possessing any knowledge about literary devices momentarily derailed Diego’s questioning, because obviously being literate was a trait worth mocking in a hockey player. Luca used the distraction to wander off and grab himself and Jax another drink from the cooler. In Luca’s book, smartassery deserved a reward. Also, Jax got the game-winning goal in game six off of Luca’s assist, winning them the Cup, so he hadn’t bought or procured his own beverages in several days.

There had been many beverages.

Luca settled on one of the many picnic blankets some poor dogsbody for the front office had been tasked with procuring and handed Jax his beer.

“Much obliged,” Jax said. He wore a white tracksuit and neon yellow sunglasses. The platinum streaks in his hair had grown out over the two months of playoffs, revealing darker roots, and his playoff beard made him seem like one of those rich people who went on retreats with no indoor plumbing to find themselves. “So what was with you and Breezy?”

Luca pursed his lips. Involuntarily, his eyes tracked back over to Chris, who had lifted his tank top up a bit to fan his stomach. The excesses of the last few days left his abs less defined than they had been after a long season made him sharper than he should be. Luca couldn’t wait to take him to Italy and feed him until he turned summer-soft and warm.

“There, you’re doing it again! Did you guys have a fight or something?”

Luca cringed all over. Where had Diego come from? “What? No!”

“Nah.” Jax shook his head imperiously. “He’s always looked at Breezy with that expression. It’s just his face.”

“Good.” Diego exhaled gustily and fell into place beside Luca. “Mara thinks you guys are hashtag goals or whatever. She would totally cry if you broke up.”

Heat crawled up Luca’s neck. He should have sent one of the team gophers to get sunscreen. The bridge of Chris’s nose shone red in the sunlight. He always forgot, and he was paler than Luca. So much beautiful creamy skin. He raised his arm to toss the frisbee in Tom’s direction and the motion revealed the gap in his shirt, showing a hint of his pecs from the side.

“Yeah, see that, that’s been his staring-at-Breezy face since the day he was called up.”

“Seriously? Bro to bro, looks like you want to murder him.”

Luca did want to give Chris a particular kind of death. He was a Conn Smythe trophy winner, a Stanley Cup champion, and frankly, if he wanted to get on his knees and suck his boyfriend’s massive dick about it, he should be allowed.

Chris broke from the game and jogged over to where they were sitting. He bent down and grabbed Luca’s beer, taking a few long draws. Luca admired the line of his throat, the bob of his Adam’s apple.

“You have to stop giving me those eyes,” Chris said. “There’s people everywhere.”

Drunk, loose, and too relaxed to be embarrassed, Luca whined, “But you’re so hot.”

Chris leaned in close. “Playoffs are over. You know what that means.”

It meant Chris could finally fuck Luca again without fear of Luca’s skating being affected during the next game.

“When we get home?” he asked.

“When we’re sober.”

“Promise?”

Chris kissed his cheek in answer.

“Yo, Breezy!” Jayden yelled. “Stop making out with your boyfriend, we’re losing here.”

“Duty calls.” Chris’s grin made his dimples dig deep in his cheeks. Luca grabbed him by the shirtfront for a proper kiss before letting him go.

In the ensuing silence, a bird chirped.

Then, Jax said, “So that’s your horny face. Could have gone my whole life not knowing, honestly.”

Luca leaned back on his elbows, draining the last of his beer. “If you had minded your own business, you wouldn’t.”

“You’re missing the most important part,” Diego said smugly.

“Oh?”

“He’s looked at Breezy like that since day one.”

Jax lifted his sunglasses and peered down at Luca. “So he has.”

Luca remained silent.

Diego shifted, his elbow brushing against Luca’s. “I’m the same, man.”

Having expected ridicule, Luca turned to him with a raised eyebrow.

“Day I met Mara, I knew. Sounds dumb, but she just…” Diego trailed off with a smile, shaking his head. “I guess I knew I’d be into her right away.”

Luca snorted. “Very wholesome.”

“Sorry, seemed rude to say “the moment I met her I knew I wanted to shove my face in her tits”.”

With a satisfied sigh, Luca let his eyes trail over Chris again, ogling him openly. He had absolutely shoved his face into Chris’s tits multiple times.

“Can’t say I wanted to date Tom immediately, but the rest…” Jax followed Luca’s line of sight toward the frisbee game. The playoff beard suited Tom better than it did most of the team, Luca would grant him, although that might be because Tom had a few years on most of the team and his beard wasn’t a patchy embarrassment.

Mara arrived on the scene carrying a laundry basket filled with water bottles. She set it on the ground, straightened and whistled loudly. “Hydrate before you die-drate,” she yelled. “Free advice for teenagers and hockey players.” She paused, eyeing Fedorov, who had tied his shirt around his head, revealing his pasty skin to the bright midday sun. “Especially teenage hockey players.”

Tom and Chris paused the frisbee game immediately and crowded around her with all the shelter kids. Chris grabbed a bottle and guzzled half before draining the rest over his head.

“Mm,” Luca hummed.

“Uh-huh,” Jax agreed, watching Tom do the same.

Jayden and Emily began using their half-empty bottles to spray each other with water by shaking the bottles up and down, causing showers of water droplets all over the grass.

Luca could see the thought process on Mara’s face, the impulse to make them behave warring with the desire to let them celebrate. A splash hit her right across the chest and she laughed before grabbing her own water bottle and joining the fun.

“Nice,” Diego said as her T-shirt got progressively soaked.

“We are pigs.” Despite the sentiment, Jax made no effort to disguise his ogling.

Luca shifted on the blanket and thought very hard about the smell of wet hockey gear. “It’s not only that he looks so good,” he said plaintively. “He’s just…I like him so much.”

“Oh my god,” Diego moaned in agreement. “She’s the coolest person I’ve ever met, and she’s dating me?”

“Least I’m safe there. Tom is not cool.”

With a wrench, Luca tore his gaze away from Chris, now dripping wet and still grinning. “Tell me you didn’t think he was cool when he handed you the Cup.”

“That’s different,” Jax said weakly.

“Mm-hm, what about if the dog were here?”

“God, he’s so cute with the dog.”

They watched the ensuing water fight in silence until the water drops began to hit them, and then Luca let Chris pull him to his feet to join in.